steve answers:

Uh, dating websites can be used as a good outlet to meet people you wouldn’t normally meet. Let’s say you work in a small office. You work 9-5 and don’t have much time to go out and meet people. There’s a few thousand right with a click of a mouse. But an entire relationship online? It dooms people to never being able to make real social connections…not to mention it’s just weird. There are fakes in real life too, but online just means you are exposed to a lot more of them at a quicker pace. As for minors on dating websites…how would that make them be lead into prostitution? Where is their proof in that? The only thing that it can most definitely get them lead into is a sex based relationship with some loser who can’t get a girl his own age.

steve answers:

Oh ok someones abit pist off, if you want a real women get out into the world, thats right leave your computer at home and go out, you could go speed dating or even to a singles night

steve answers:

A woman was recently in the news who had been sending someone money on a monthly basis to help a father with a disabled adult son for some 20 years. It was only discovered when the woman herself was becoming somewhat senile and her children stepped into to help her with her finances and discovered she had sent this man thousands of dollars a year and he had no children with disabilities.

A long time ago, I was involved with a group called HSX as a moderator. It was a Compuserve group that focused on sexuality. One of the things the owner of this group was insistent upon was that people identify what sex they were and be accurate. So people could accuse people that they were representing them self as the wrong sex and we would call them up and try to confirm what sex they were. It was pretty interesting what lengths people would go to to pretend they were the opposite sex.

The things we looked for were…posting conflicting information, posting information that seemed to not make sense given other known information, that they said they lived in either very rural places (so no one would know them or try to visit) or in big cities (where they could could easily not know someone else who also lived there), that they seemed to have a script that they followed – certain phrases frequently repeated – like they had a cheat sheet. They also often bragged about things they owned or jobs they had that no one could confirm. (Lots of people working in jobs in security so they couldn’t say where.) Sometimes I felt a bit like Big Brother – and in the end I quit being a moderator because of policies related to people who were transgendered and what sex they should be considered. Sometimes people were being completely honest from their own perspective – so you need to be careful that what may appear to be a scammer may not be.

I think most scammers are either really insecure about who they really are or have simply come up with a plan to try to get scam others out of whatever they have without any concern for them.

Lots of scams on FB – people trying to raise money for good causes that don’t exist, setting up meets with supposed food and drink and special guests when nothing is happening at all. (One of these happened recently near where I live – hundreds of people showed up expecting to go to this popular restaurant with free appetizers and special guests – lines to get in the door – nothing was actually happening. FB scam. Someone was probably watching and getting a hoot out of it.)

steve answers:

Yes, it’s as safe (if not safer) than just picking-up some stranger in a bar. However, you’ll find that as a single male it is very difficult to break into the swinger lifestyle with couples and there are not a whole lot of single females on swinger dating sites.

It’s hard for a single male to break into the lifestyle with couples because there have been so many single males that just “don’t get it” and have ruined the fun for others that come after them. What I mean by “don’t get it” is that they are lecherous and rude and think that just because a woman is on a swingers dating site that they are looking for sex anytime, anywhere and with anyone.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Swingers are people just like anyone else and the same rules that would apply to trying to score with a single girl you met at work or at a night club applies to swinger women, also. The fact is that most swingers have very plentiful and satisfying sex lives at home with their spouse so they don’t need you, but if they have a certain MFM threesome fantasy or they like to play where the wife goes out and is naughty with someone else, than they will be looking for you.

The other thing is that for every couple looking to add a single male to their sex play there are two single males looking for them. Your odds that way are terrible. By comparison, there are 25 couples looking for single women for every single woman looking for a couple.

If you do get lucky and a couple wants to meet you you are going to be pretty dang safe. Most couples will want to meet you in a public place like a restaurant or sports bar, etc. To see if there is any chemistry and if they want to go further with you. Also, some websites like Swingular validate their members as “Real” or “VIP” meaning they have have provided proof to the website owner that they are who they say they are.

I hope that helps. For some good information about being a single guy in the lifestyle, check-out The Swingers Board forums. Believe me, there are plenty of couples looking for a good single guy, so if you can stand-out from the crowd you’ll do well.

steve answers:

Last weekend was a “free” weekend on e-Harmony. She probably doesn’t have a paid membership and wanted a way to connect outside of the site…